So I decided to do this thing about a month ago and get “CALM” tattooed on my knuckles. I originally was going to do “STAY CALM” on both hands but I don’t know if I am that badass to have all my knuckles tattooed.

 

I did like the multiple meanings of Stay and the idea of having that on my body. Fuck there have been a few periods of my life where I had to convince myself it was worth it to stay. Life felt so hard at times that escaping with drugs was all I could do to handle the pain. I don’t know where I would be today if I hadn’t met my ex-husband at the age of 20. I tell people all the time he saved my life. And I know he did. (That story will have to wait for another blog post.)

 

But calm. Calm resonates so much with me in my adult life. How can I stop the spinning of anxiety and just “STAY CALM.” We have this fight or flight system that is built into our genetics. A fire inside us that if fed can grow out of control. Then as we grow we are taught to fight. As a young girl, growing up in a single mother household, I felt like I had to fight for everything. It is exhausting to always be on guard. I appreciate the struggle because I am a strong, independent woman today but I know the same result can be accomplished in a healthier way.

 

We fight with our words, our fists, our emotions. Calm tattooed on my punching fist. Can we teach our children to not fight with their fists and words but to just “Stay Calm”? I want to teach my children meditation and slowing down. I want them to be aware when someone around them is hurting so they can be sensitive to how their actions affect them.  I don’t want them to learn to have to fight and scream to be heard. There is incredible self-empowerment in being able to control your emotions and calm yourself down. Teach them that the fire inside them is a beautiful thing. Teach them to use it as positive energy and not let it get out of control.

 

The fight or flight is inside us. It is primal. We can all use it in a positive way. This is my message. Stay Calm. Spread love. Live life.

 

- Amanda (@missdjlux)

With the Holiday Season upon us, I just thought I would take a moment to share another perspective with you.  Especially with everything going on in society right now. There are so many things I wish I could go back and do differently with my children.  I can’t go back in time, but if I continue to share what I have learned along the way then maybe I can influence the next generation in a positive way.

Don’t get me wrong, I LOVE a good hug and being an empath, a hug from the right person can give me such a recharge of energy, but before I learned that I had a choice, that I didn’t have to hug everyone, it was also a fast way to deplete my energy. When our children are young, 3-6 years old, they are discovering that they are their own person. With this discovery comes a time of learning to listen to their instincts, learning that they have a voice, learning that they’re emotions and feelings are theirs and not their parents. We as adults have a responsibility to help them navigate all of these feelings, not to push ours onto them.

Think about this for a moment, it’s Thanksgiving and Uncle Johnny shows up who hasn’t been around for years. You say to your daughter or son, “go give Uncle Johnny a big hug, you need to thank him for the present he sent you on your Birthday”.  Do we want our children to learn that if someone gives them a “present” they have to “hug” them or allow them to “touch” them when it feels uncomfortable to them? Now I know some of you are thinking, “but this is my family, I trust them, my children should trust me”.  Uncle Johnny is a stranger to your child, they need the opportunity to get to know them, to feel comfortable around them before they get that close to them. We need to teach our children to learn what their feelings are and what they’re boundaries are. They need to learn that when something doesn’t feel right, it’s ok to say no. Now I’m not saying to give your children permission to be rude, give them options, a handshake or high-five, and teach them to do what feels comfortable for them.

Personally, I know that as a child, I was always expected to give everyone a hug when they came to visit or left. What a confusing thing to do to our children.  I always BEG people when I am around their children to not force them to hug me. They need to learn that they have a voice both inside and out and we need to respect that. How can they learn what their boundaries are if we as adults constantly force them to do something that feels unnatural or uncomfortable? It doesn't mean they don't like us or have anything against us, it just means that we're not welcome into their most intimate circle and that's ok!  What a beautiful thing it is when they do feel comfortable enough to let us in.

PLEASE, if you have ever agreed with anything I've posted, PLEASE take this one to heart because I believe it with every fiber of my being. Allow your children to OWN their boundaries! Allow every hug they give and receive to reenergize them because all they feel is LOVE.

Happy Holidays! May we all be blessed with a Safe and Loving Holiday Season filled with Gratitude...

- Celeste (@motherhealing 💖🙏🏻💗)

 

I spend most of my days giving people advice through my work and personal relationships.  So often I hear, “it must feel so good to be you! You always know what to say”  Well I’m here to tell you I DON’T!  I am so grateful and humbled when I am able to guide someone to stand in their own power and make positive changes in their life, but I don’t always have the answer,  Especially when it comes to my own life.  We all are here to learn lessons and to continue to grow.  I have found over the years that the most difficult lessons and times in my life, the ones that “hurt” the most, are the ones that I have learned the biggest lessons from.  

 

Well, today I find myself facing a lesson that has reoccurred over and over again throughout my life.  It is a belief of not being good enough, deserving of success, happiness, love.  I have been so close, so many times in my life to having everything I’ve dreamed of only to sabotage the situation and run away from it.  Not today!  TODAY, I stand and fight! TODAY, I stand in my POWER!  Today I choose to believe, to know that everything I am seeking is seeking me. To sit in the moment, in the feeling and know that if I grow thru it, it will all come. Today, instead of feeding the fear and running, I chose to sit in silence and embrace the feelings and be grateful for the lesson. In this silence I realized that the problem wasn’t the feelings I was having, the problem was the control I gave to them and what I chose to do with them.  

 

Never reject your feelings, whether happy, sad, scared, depressed, angry…. they are all valid and you are feeling them for a reason.  Embrace them, accept them, be grateful for them.  If you like the feeling, stay in it!  But if you don’t, then grow thru it and LET IT GO! 

 🙏🏻💕🙏🏻Celeste (@motheringhealing)

Sober. The New Curse Word.

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Wow! What a crazy intense journey I have been on the last few years. I went from feeling like a complete victim to standing in my power and starting this business! I was talking to a friend last night and we were discussing how most women take care of everything around them and everyone else around them and not themselves. I stated that when I started to take care of myself is when my world changed. THIS STATEMENT HAS SO MUCH TRUTH.  It seems so simple to take care of ourselves but yet we don’t. Putting yourself first is not an option but a priority. If something feels off, change it. Mentally, emotionally, physically...they can all be changed by starting with baby steps.

I am not quite sure where my path is leading me but I do know I want to share my story. Mia from @thesoberglow said it best. “ I don’t write to prove I have perfected life. I write to show you we all have our own imperfect journey.”

- Amanda (@missdjlux)